Georgia has always been a place I've traveled through on my way to someplace else. Besides a brief weekend in Atlanta with friends and a day trip to the zoo my impression of Georgia has been from images flashing by my car window and scents drifting through the vents.
Many parts of Georgia are very beautiful. I love the areas thick with large pine trees and red clay soil. Driving up the coast through Northern Florida and Southern Georgia has been unpleasant. I can't stand the sulphur smell. People from the area say they get used to it but I don't see how.
As a child riding in the back seat of my parents car I remember seeing a billboard for the Ku Klux Klan. It frightened me. Whenever I thought of Georgia for many years it conjured up images of the Klan and remembrances of sulphur scent.
I've been wanting to take off for a while but my kids need help now. No-one longs to move as much as I do, and I try to control my wanderlust.
I do these addictive internet searches for jobs, cost of living comparisons, and available housing. I find random spots based on available jobs and cost of living and start dreaming. I then irritate my family to no end. I tell them what the weather is doing in Oklahoma, or how much the average rent is in Oregon, or which stores are hiring in Ohio. Eldest daughter said she would like to move to Georgia or South Carolina. I researched both states and found an area in Georgia that had available jobs and fairly cheap rent. I needed a break quite badly at the same time and decided to check it out.
The get away was much needed. We rented a quiet cabin and it was nice despite the bee sting. We relaxed and fed the ducks.
I tried to ignore the swastika carved on the inside of the cabin door. Don't they check the place out and get rid of hateful graffiti. When I read the local paper I noticed that they pointed out the skin color of anyone that did wrong unless they were white. "An eighteen year old black woman" scratched a police officer. The fifty year old who was arrested for having a meth lab in his house was listed by name and age only.
We passed several homes with rebel flags flying in the front yard. One home had a sheriffs vehicle parked under the rebel flag. If I were a little braver I would have run down his driveway and knocked on his front door to let him know the war was over. My husband said that would be a very bad idea. I hate racism.
On our first night away my son moved back home temporarily. That was on my mind. Youngest daughter is going through great drama of her own. That was on my mind. I tried to relax.
At first we spent some time just driving down random roads. There were hills and trees and pretty homes out in the country. Flower beds were blooming, there was no sulphur smell at all, and it was slightly cooler than Florida. There were no rentals available right there on the drive, so we decided to collect the addresses of several homes in the area that we could afford.
I made a list, mapquested directions, and away we went. We were immediately depressed when we found that first one, after the second one we gave up altogether. the housing we could afford was in an area where ten out of twelve houses were boarded up, there were bars on the doors and windows of any businesses in the area, and we spotted four individuals openly dealing drugs on random corners.
We decided to leave a day early and check on youngest daughter on the way home. My worries are many now. We've decided that temporarily at least we cannot make a final decision on a move when all of our children need us. We have food and shelter for them, a soft place to land, but we do not have money to send when they get into a jam. We will be unable to help at all if we spend our savings on a move. As much as I want to go, I am not finished here. This darn motherhood, it never ends.
That's not to say if an opportunity presents itself we won't take it. I'm still searching. I feel like life is slipping by terribly fast and we are just treading water where we are. It was good to find out that Georgia wasn't quite what we were looking for before a move was made.
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You are such a dedicated mother.
ReplyDeleteI am glad you found this out before you made a move. I hate racism in any form and it drives me insane that people still think this way.
ReplyDeleteHope your children are well
Judy
Hi, I love your posts. I too at times have explored in detail sites like city-data.com to find the "perfect" place to live/work/retire. I've also made scouting trips to several areas, the problem is...all my wonderful friends live here. And I would miss them too much. My life wouldn't be so perfect without them.
ReplyDeleteIt's always good to do your research and due diligence before moving. I'm sorry to hear that the kids are in the middle of some hairy stuff--here's hoping that they make it through the tough stuff they're dealing with, and they know how much you're doing for them.
ReplyDeleteSounds like scouting the area in advance was really smart. I hear that places like North Dakota are pretty cheap to live and have strong economies. Too bad they have such brutal winters.
ReplyDeleteRacism is alive and well here in the north (Chicago), too. Folks don't fly rebel flags, but they discriminate. That's almost worse because you have no warning that the person is a bigoted jerk.
WP: I hear you, I hear you, I hear you. Sometimes all any of us can do is tread water, hold the fort, and hope we all--children, parents, friends, community--come out okay on the other side. There seems to be a lot more of that (treading water, holding the fort) than before.
ReplyDeleteHang in there.
I research other places too! I often feel like giving in to my wanderlust and visiting different places until reality hits. I have a daughter, son in law and a new grand baby vand we also have DH' s 3 adult kids. My DS lives on the other side of the US but has come home when economic necessity has struck. Like you I am mindful that they may need a place to land. Ah well, maybe in a few years....good luck to you!
ReplyDelete"When I read the local paper I noticed that they pointed out the skin color of anyone that did wrong unless they were white." This is hard to believe.
ReplyDeleteOther than the mention of pine trees and red clay soil, it sounds like you were trying to slander the whole state of Georgia.
Racism is alive and well here in the north (Chicago), too. Folks don't fly rebel flags, but they discriminate. That's almost worse because you have no warning that the person is a bigoted jerk.
ReplyDeleteSo true! I'm up in Boston (though you'll laugh--I thought Chicago was much less segregated than home) and it's much the same. Sometimes people will leave me a bit O_o, and that takes some doing since I can be a bit oblivious about these things.
I've lived in South Carolina all my life and my local newspaper was similar with its descriptions but that changed about 25 years ago. I'm sorry that you saw such ugly things in Georgia but those few instances by no means represent the whole state or the South in general.
ReplyDeleteI have been following your blog for some time. However, I don't like the way you portrayed Georgia in this current entry. There are poor sections of every state. Georgia has been (and continues to be) one of the fastest growing states in the nation population wise. There's a reason for that! We have many jobs and a reasonable cost-of-living rate.
ReplyDeleteThe fact that not ONE of your THREE grown kids can support themselves as independently functioning adults speaks volumes about your "motherhood" problems. Until you and your husband set some boundaries with these "kids" you two will never have the financial stability to follow your dreams.
I speak for many Georgians when I say, "Please, stay in Florida!"
I wonder how many other readers you offended with this current article.
Sassy, LOL, I'll have to let them know that.
ReplyDeleteJudy, it's everywhere in one form or another. They'll be fine. :)
ReplyDeleteZoe, I really need to get a new career that involves traveling so I can quit driving everyone mad.
ReplyDeletePamela, as I write this they are planning to get back out on their own within weeks. This is only temporary.
ReplyDeleteLinda, I keep hearing about that state but I'm not so sure about those winters.
ReplyDeleteApril, treading water is getting old, that's one reason I keep looking.
ReplyDeleteTerry, that's very important in this economy, a temporary soft spot to land.
ReplyDelete444, this was one very small town newspaper in one little place that I visited. I glanced through a few articles and the police report. I did not mean come off as so negative about an entire state. I was only there a few days. I have family that have lived in the state, as well as friends, and even customers at work. There are some wonderful people from the state. I certainly didn't mean to offend.
ReplyDeletePamela #2, it certainly sticks in your mind when you witness it.
ReplyDeleteCarrie,I have lived in different Southern states myself as well. I certainly didn't mean to offend. There are beautiful areas and some terrific people from the South.
ReplyDeleteGeorgia Gal, I apologize for offending you. I was describing one brief trip to one small town and certainly did not mean for this to be a description of an entire state or the whole population of Georgia.
ReplyDeleteAs for my children not being independently functioning adults, two work, ones a mom. I do not provide support for them. I only allow them to stay at home when there is an emergency. When there is a breakup or a rental was foreclosed they have a home here temporarily. I'm sure you would do the same.
Hi WP: When my cousin was 20 years old she chose between the 2 careers she thought were available to her, travel agent or stewardess. We both are 57 yrs young, so in those days flight attendants were called stewardesses. She chose travel agent and had a great time taking short company paid for trips, and I do mean short -- like 2 days in europe. She loved traveling! Sadly the internet has made travel agents almost a thing of the past. I eventually became an RN. I've worked with a lot of nurses who were travel RNs. They travel from hospital to hospital working 13 week contracts, their housing is paid for and pre-arranged. Some nurses travel with a friend or their spouse. Hawaii in winter, Pacific NW in summer, one nurse I work with even worked in England for a time...sadly the economy has caused hospitals to cut back on hiring temporary nurses. But what a great way for someone to see/experience the country. Just FYI, most of my friends are nurses or teachers and most of their college-aged kids are NOT having an easy time transitioning to completely independent adulthood. College tuition is a huge expense, good paying jobs for many new grads are scarce. What a sad place this would be if families did not help each other in time of need. I applaud you and your husband. I hope this cheeers you up a little :)
ReplyDeleteZoe, thank you. Yes it did! :)
ReplyDeleteI hate racism myself. Any form of hate saddens me as this world would be a better place without it.
ReplyDeleteHappy Mother's day. This world needs more mothers and families willing to help each other out.
Happy (belated) Mother's Day!
ReplyDeleteI live in Louisiana and my daughter is in college in Alabama. Let me say that you will find like-minded people wherever you go--in spite of appearances and in spite of reputation.
ReplyDeleteMuch to her surprise, my daughter has fallen in love with Alabama and the many social activists she's met there.
I live in Vermont, formerly a Texan. Racism exists in every state in one form or another. After looking for 'home'all my life, I've settled in Vermont. The winters are brutal, jobs scarce...but what a view! I do understand the need to look for something better. I think you are an awesome mother. My twenty year old son is back at home. I don't have money but I will always be a port in a storm for my kids.
ReplyDelete