Sunday, February 14, 2010

Bittersweet Journeys and Motherly Guilt

I'm glad I made the journey. It is always good to visit family from out of state that you don't get to see often. It is bittersweet when there are health problems and you know there won't be many more visits. We surprised my dad by picking up my eldest daughter along the way and bringing his great grand baby. The joy on his face made the whole trip worth it.

When the kids were little I often suffered from what I call motherly guilt. When I couldn't afford a toy they really wanted, I suffered. When I couldn't get the day off for their birthday and we had to celebrate on another day, I had motherly guilt again. Now they are all grown and I still get motherly guilt. My son just started a job so he couldn't leave. My daughter is working a full schedule and had to stay. My husband had to stay and work as well. So today, valentines day and more importantly, tomorrow his birthday I am here. We had made plans for his birthday for the first time ever. We usually just work our birthdays as any other day but this year we decided to do something. I'm feeling bad for that too. We both know that things happen and we can reschedule because this trip was important. I still feel bad. What's wrong with me? I also feel really bad because he has to work and I got to take a trip and visit with our grand baby. Silly, I know. I just wish we all could have afforded to take off and come up here.

1 comment:

  1. WP: I hear you. But lay your guilt aside (you can always pick it up later) and savor the time with your dad. You and your husband will find the time and space to celebrate his birthday, just not on the birthday. I'm glad you were able to make the trip. (And Happy birthday to your husband!)