Seeing is Believing

Georgia has always been a place I've traveled through on my way to someplace else. Besides a brief weekend in Atlanta with friends and a day trip to the zoo my impression of Georgia has been from images flashing by my car window and scents drifting through the vents.

Many parts of Georgia are very beautiful. I love the areas thick with large pine trees and red clay soil. Driving up the coast through Northern Florida and Southern Georgia has been unpleasant. I can't stand the sulphur smell. People from the area say they get used to it but I don't see how.

As a child riding in the back seat of my parents car I remember seeing a billboard for the Ku Klux Klan. It frightened me. Whenever I thought of Georgia for many years it conjured up images of the Klan and remembrances of sulphur scent.

I've been wanting to take off for a while but my kids need help now. No-one longs to move as much as I do, and I try to control my wanderlust.

I do these addictive internet searches for jobs, cost of living comparisons, and available housing. I find random spots based on available jobs and cost of living and start dreaming. I then irritate my family to no end. I tell them what the weather is doing in Oklahoma, or how much the average rent is in Oregon, or which stores are hiring in Ohio. Eldest daughter said she would like to move to Georgia or South Carolina. I researched both states and found an area in Georgia that had available jobs and fairly cheap rent. I needed a break quite badly at the same time and decided to check it out.

The get away was much needed. We rented a quiet cabin and it was nice despite the bee sting. We relaxed and fed the ducks.

I tried to ignore the swastika carved on the inside of the cabin door. Don't they check the place out and get rid of hateful graffiti. When I read the local paper I noticed that they pointed out the skin color of anyone that did wrong unless they were white. "An eighteen year old black woman" scratched a police officer. The fifty year old who was arrested for having a meth lab in his house was listed by name and age only.

We passed several homes with rebel flags flying in the front yard. One home had a sheriffs vehicle parked under the rebel flag. If I were a little braver I would have run down his driveway and knocked on his front door to let him know the war was over. My husband said that would be a very bad idea. I hate racism.

On our first night away my son moved back home temporarily. That was on my mind. Youngest daughter is going through great drama of her own. That was on my mind. I tried to relax.

At first we spent some time just driving down random roads. There were hills and trees and pretty homes out in the country. Flower beds were blooming, there was no sulphur smell at all, and it was slightly cooler than Florida. There were no rentals available right there on the drive, so we decided to collect the addresses of several homes in the area that we could afford.

I made a list, mapquested directions, and away we went. We were immediately depressed when we found that first one, after the second one we gave up altogether. the housing we could afford was in an area where ten out of twelve houses were boarded up, there were bars on the doors and windows of any businesses in the area, and we spotted four individuals openly dealing drugs on random corners.

We decided to leave a day early and check on youngest daughter on the way home. My worries are many now. We've decided that temporarily at least we cannot make a final decision on a move when all of our children need us. We have food and shelter for them, a soft place to land, but we do not have money to send when they get into a jam. We will be unable to help at all if we spend our savings on a move. As much as I want to go, I am not finished here. This darn motherhood, it never ends.

That's not to say if an opportunity presents itself we won't take it. I'm still searching. I feel like life is slipping by terribly fast and we are just treading water where we are. It was good to find out that Georgia wasn't quite what we were looking for before a move was made.

A Vacation, Working Poor Style

I really haven't put much writing time in this month. I do feel guilty but we are in the midst of changes. My husband and I are currently on a little vacation, a much needed break. We can't really afford the typical vacation so we are doing this working poor style.

One way to trim costs on a vacation is to skip eating out all the time. Yes, we brought a cooler to save money, although we aren't perfect so we are eating out a little bit. One of the biggest costs beside transportation are hotel fees. We opted for a rustic cabin rental in a KOA campground instead. I stayed at one before and really enjoyed it. The cabin has two bunk beds, a full sized bed, a desk and a chair, and a window unit air conditioner. There is electricity and WIFI. You can't be severely addicted to television when you stay in one. There is no television and the WIFI isn't fast enough to HULU.

The last cabin I rented was about fifteen feet away from the restrooms and showers. I was slightly irritated this morning when I had to walk all the way around the pond for the restroom. The Canadian geese attempted to cheer me up with a hearty greeting But I was still in a foul mood. (Horrible pun intended.)

Last night when we checked in there was a giant mutant wasp/hornet/bee thing on the window shade. I used to raise tarantulas, and am kind to all creatures. I even carry spiders out of the house for my husband. He wanted it out of the room. I told him it was in a difficult spot to catch because of the window shade and we would most likely get stung trying to get out or damage something in the room. We made the bed, walked all the way around the pond to the restrooms, and came back. I sat down on the edge of the bed and bolted up immediately.

We turned on the porch light and the inside light and I stood in the doorway to our little cabin rubbing my butt furiously while my husband tried to get the injured mutant wasp/hornet/bee thing out of the room. After a tussle with the mutant my husband lost track of him and we couldn't find him again. I slept lightly, jumping at every small noise, certain he was going to find me in the middle of the night to finish the job. It was a rough start for our all too short vacation.

Like always it is a dual purpose vacation. We can have a bit of fun each day, but then we also have to look for jobs and rental properties because I am thinking of moving up here. It looks promising so far, now if I can only get my husband to stop singing the Bumble Bee Tuna theme song and referring to me as his little bumble bee. He also opened the door to the cabin this morning and said there was someone to see me. I thought one of the geese had wandered up to the porch but no it was a giant mutant wasp/hornet/bee thing. If I could only train one to bite him on the butt too...

My Restless Spirit Endures a Setback

It feels terrible at times to be middle aged and have no idea what you want, or where you want to live. My mind is a constant whirlwind of longing, of wanting to drift from one place to another. That's one bright side of being poor. If you have a restless spirit you are not tied down to a career or a house.

I want to travel so badly I considered taking off a summer and tent camping across the country. My husband put an end to that when he said he could not survive in a tent for more than the occasional weekend. He did say he would consent to pare down our belongings and live in an RV so we could move frequently with little fuss.

We went over our tight budget and started looking at dealerships. There are so many styles to choose from. They kept showing us pricey models but we needed something much cheaper. We went over our income and our bills and decided what we could afford. We researched and thought of gas, propane, park fees when we would be in one place for several months, and tags and insurance as well. We knew what we could afford to spend. I will not overextend our budget.

We decided to visit one of the dealerships and fill out the preliminary paperwork. We were sure we would qualify, after all in three months we will be debt free. We had a small down payment saved up. They took the paperwork back to the owner so he could fax it in and he took one look at our income and said no way. He said our income was too low and the amount of rent we paid each month was too high. This was the cheapest house we could find when we moved to this area. They offered to sell us something much older than we wanted if we spent our entire emergency fund and maxed out our credit card for the rest. We said, "No thank you." and headed back to the drawing board.

Tent camping is out, and RVing is out, however I must move on. My wonderful understanding husband has agreed and he is still willing to pare down those belongings and MOVE! I don't know where we are going yet but I am so excited. I do know that I am looking for an area with better job opportunities. We are currently making the same yearly salary together that I once made by myself. We must boost the income while fulfilling my need to move. Does anyone have any favorite places or secret Utopias you want tell about?

Here I Go Again

I wrote a silly post with an even sillier title about a vacation and then I disappeared. I'm certainly not keeping up with this blog on a daily basis as I envisioned when I started. I have every intention of daily posts and wonderful ideas. Life gets in the way.

I'd love to tell you I've been away on a fabulous vacation but that certainly isn't the truth. The truth is I've been working extra hours and when a spare moment presents itself I've been very busy decluttering my home. While nowhere near a hoarder, I still have a great amount of stuff that's taking up way too much space in my home and in my life. I hope to have it cleared up soon. What doesn't sell in a yard sale will be donated to charity. We moved from a four bedroom home to a three and now to a two but have carried most of the stuff with us. Why? I couldn't tell you.

It's dreadful that I do this but when I'm planning future changes such as a move I live in a state of limbo. I daydream about where I will live or work. I save all the money I can and plan no short trips in the meantime. I just want to move on with my life and get to the next spot so bad. It isn't happening fast enough. The most frustrating aspect of my wait is there is no sign of a recovering economy in my area. Everything is at a standstill.

I manage to make ends meet, but barely. I feel as if I've worked so hard this past year. I've given it my all, gone in almost every time I was called, have always been courteous professional and fast. I've done it all yet when my W2 came back I realized I only earned $11,000 for an entire year of my life and energy. I made three times that when I worked retail management, which required the same amount of energy and only a few more hours, although there is no overtime here.

Wow. This discovery made me blue and then made me realize I need to do this move as swiftly as possible. So I will be squeezing the budget as tightly as possible. Savings must build up quickly because I don't want to live in limbo anymore. I want to enjoy my life.